To My Daughter: What You May Not Believe Before Age 30

By Erin Ott, age 28

1.  Your body is beautiful and deserves to be loved.
2.  Most people are so worried about themselves that they aren’t judging you.  If they are, then it’s between them and God.
3.  The weight of the world doesn’t have to be on your shoulders, but somebody needs to act courageously to bring about peace and change.  That can be you.
3a.  When changing the world, start with bringing peace to your family and enemies.
4.  You are precious beyond explanation, regardless of whether that boy likes you, loves you, breaks up with you, or tries to convince you the opposite is true.
5.  Periods, childbirth, menopause, and hips are all necessary evils of womanhood.  God chose you to be a woman because you are strong enough to handle it beautifully.
6.  There is no possible way to describe the fear your parents have of losing you.  Try to be patient with us.
7.  You can accomplish anything you set your mind to.   Anything.  As Elmo discovered in Grouchland, you just have to “take the first step.”
8.  Celebrate being an introvert!  It is the gift of keeping your observations, thoughts, and feelings a secret until the exact right moment you’re ready to dazzle the world with your brilliance.  Awkward silence is just a myth—the extroverts will always fill the air for you.
9.  Your birthday is a celebration for the whole world.  Always treat a birthday as if it’s the most important day of the year. 
10.  General manners are always appropriate, even when you're crabby.  Saying please, thank you, and giving a smile will get you everywhere, even when you feel like the world doesn’t deserve your courtesy.
11.  Everyone is worth the effort.  Seeking to develop the potential in humanity is the single greatest thing, and single hardest thing, you can do for yourself.  Nurturing others will elevate your soul.
12.  Spider veins are beautiful; they just show the outside world how strong your heart is.
13.  Taking risks is a necessary practice.  If you don’t, you’ll remain stagnant as the world passes you by.
14.  Sticks and stones break bones, but words can break spirit and trust.  Try very, very hard to not say something you'll regret.
15.  There are plenty of occasions where you should not defend yourself.  Admit when you’re wrong without following it with “but…”  The same rule applies for giving compliments, by the way.
16.  There are no occasions for which you should decide to hide your intelligence.  Pretending to be dumber than you are only makes dumb people de-value you.
17. Waiting for Jesus to come down and save us will only put you in a state of complacency and distance from God.  You ARE Jesus’ hands, feet, words, and heart, and you must act on this every day (especially when you’re overwhelmed with thinking about what a privileged life you have).
18.  You can always do better, but believe that you’re already enough.
19.  Incorrect spelling and grammar are sometimes deal-breakers in some situations.  Misspelling homonyms and misusing semi-colons and apostrophes can devastate your chances of being taken seriously.
20.  Sometimes your soul-mate falls in your lap.  Your father is the best example of a man of decency that I’ve ever met.  I pray often that you seek to marry someone as equally virtued as he is.
20a.  When it comes to decide if you want to get married, just know that it is hard work.  Pick someone who also believes #11.
21.  Reading books that are too easy or too hard for you is your right as an intellectual.  I’ve learned some of my best life lessons from a weird combination of Dr. Seuss, Jack Handey, and the occasional Austen.
22.  You really will think better after a full night’s sleep.
23.  You will think worse after disappointments, dehydration, flattery, and flirtation.
24.  As a mother, I make mistakes and sometimes you might suffer because of them.  I'll probably lose more sleep over it than you, and will really need your forgiveness at times.
25.  God is the basis of all things.  If something seems wrong, it's because it is void of God.  Don't let yourself get sucked into that void.